Recently been having alot of thoughts about myself lately. Wenjun says changes are a good thing but dun ever lose myself, Ade says tht i have changed, am not the same like before, am more decisive and critical.
I keep thinking were the changes good or bad? I can never come up with an answer for myself. Thinking, ideas and principles i hold so strongly last time seems like all a fantasy that i created for myself because i feel that should be the way a person should live their lifes. But recently i am starting to question myself about wad i believe in last time. It seems like i am losing myself or am i still searching for the true "ah long".
I keep telling myself that after last year i finally started to think more. But the more i think the more i feel it is not jus the past year, i feel it has been years after years of accommadating and accepting everything be it good or bad actually made me realise tht probably enough is enough? Why should i be accommodating to the extend that i use to be??
I have created a barrier around myself now in order to protect myself even more than ever. I dun trust people easily now. Even for those i trust i will still create that barrier around me to protect myself for any unpredictable consequences. I dun laugh and try to be fun all the time anymore. I am starting to keep to myself more and always want to be in my own world.
Actually i also dunno wad i have become. Hopefully i can find the true "ah long" soon.